Why I Started this Blog.

Untitled designI haven’t been taking part in the ultimate blogging challenge, but I decided to do day 3 of it, hope that is okay.

So day 3 is why you started your blog.

I started mine in November 2015. I had six months off of school, had just gotten “fired” from my first job ever and was so bored with my life. I felt like I had no purpose, I felt that I wasn’t putting my creativity anywhere and everything was just kind of stagnant. Day in day out would be spent on youtube, twitter, instagram, mindlessly scrolling and clicking on literally any youtube video that would keep me from becoming so bored that I could tear my hair out. I’ve always loved writing and I had stumbled across a tumblr account which wrote beautiful pieces. I decided that it was time to put MY free time into something that wasn’t completely meaningless. So I started this blog. I haven’t come very far- I don’t write this blog for the views or for the reads, just for myself. When I feel inspired I write something and put it on here. That may be often or very occasionally.

I remember how it felt to be completely stuck in what felt like an endless rut, in fact recently I’ve fallen back into the rut. So my first post on my blog was a short “story” about how I felt about the time whilst I was in school and kind of how I felt at the moment. It was before I had found veganism and I felt disgusting and tired and sluggish. Sometimes when I feel stuck, I read through this blog and manage to inspire myself again.

Here is an extract, and other pieces of my favourite parts in my first post.

November 16, 2015.

Exhaustion

t’s 4pm, and the weight of the world has knocked you off your feet and onto the plushy comfort of your living room couch. The drive back is a blur. All you remember is “school was fine” and nibbling half-heartedly on a meatball sub, the sandwich wrapping crinkling beneath your fingers. Lying down on the back seat of the car, head on one side, feet on the other. Toes resting on the window. All you remember is the feeling of the road beneath you, the gentle vibrations the car made as it turned bends and twisted around roundabouts. The feeling of your eyes, as laden as the responsibilities sitting on your shoulders. Shoulders, so heavy. So heavy you’re almost certain there’s someone, something sitting on them, pressing down on you so hard it hurts.

…..

The tiredness has not only hit you now but yesterday, when you felt dizzy in class and your eyes were wandering and your mind was drifting and your teacher made you stay back for not paying attention. The tiredness was there then, and it was there when you sat under fluorescent lights at 8 in the morning, head in the palms of your hands. Sweater wrapped around you like a blanket. Tiredness was there then.

It’s here now.

So you lie on the couch, brain fuzzy, and dread the moment you have to get up and get back to the reality of all nighters and 6ams, cold pizza for lunch and pencil lead tainting your hands.

Since I’ve started my blog I’ve gotten through half a year of school, discovered veganism and other things about myself. I’ve also applied for a major in creative writing in University. I hope all goes well, and I hope everything is well with you. Thank you so much for reading and hope you enjoyed this post.

 

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9 thoughts on “Why I Started this Blog.

  1. oh darling i totally feel you!! i created mine not long ago 🙂 blogging makes me soooo happy. Im so sorry about your job but hey… its there loss not yours babe xx cant wait to read more posts from you lovely xxxxxxxxxx

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